Recapped!: “Sex Machine”

“….was there an earthquake?”

words: desmond “neo” childs

Wow, they can’t all be gold, folks! Well! What we have here is a very, very explicit hour and four minutes of sex. I watched this film as a request for listener, Scrimshawdroop94. And I gotta tell you, listener recommedations are the only thing that’ll get me to watch something like this. It’s basically a live-action hentai. The scenes where characters spoke only served as filler for the 5 to 6 scenes of wild, goofy fornication and perversion. Not only was it incredibly uncomfortable watching this with four other people; but the supporting humor here falls flat. More on how I disliked this later.

Directed By: Yuji Tajiri

This is the biggest photo of the guy I could find. After seeing a film like Sex Machine, I wouldn’t have a reason to have an abundant amount of pictures floating around the web, either. He’s the director of 8 films in addition to Sex Machine, but has yet to recieve any type of award or cease and desist letter.He’s been around the business since about 1995, and seems to have made a trademark out of his tongue-in-cheek love scenes. All I can say toward his directorial hand in this one is that he’s fond of using a handheld to “creep” up on characters on screen. It gives this feeling as if we as the audience were just a bunch of voyeurs like some of the characters in the movie. To say this was a waste of time would not accurately convey how it affected me. It wasn’t a waste, in that I enjoy seeing movies that fail or succeed. There are a number of reasons I think this movie sorta face planted; but it did managed to raise my interest in one thing: cricket sumo. Never heard of such a term until watching this, and it’s truly a bizarre site to behold. Male crickets who haven’t eaten in a while, push one another out of a bug-sized “sumo” ring in order to win the affection of a female cricket. Weird, right? Anyway, if you’re interested in silly characters who aimlessly sleep with one another (CONSTANTLY!) than this is the best 1 hour and 4 minutes spent. If not, don’t bother. I do not regret watching it, but it was a great example on how NOT to make a romantic-sex comedy. Even if they did market this film as a screwball comedy, the antics of the main character are so foreign to my Dallas, Texas mind that I couldn’t even force a laugh. Sorry, but it wasn’t that funny. As usual, you can check this film out on Netflix Instant watch. Be warned, the sex scenes are very graphic! I’m talking sounds, fluids, veggie games, whatever! I could not find a trailer for this “film” so you’ll have to go in “blind” *chuckles*.

 

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